Maintaining Humanity in Aversion
I’ve been studying the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism recently. I really appreciate the simplicity and straight-forwardness of Buddhist teachings. They are for the lay person - not just esoteric, overly mysterious philosophical musings like many spiritual teachings tend to be. The Four Noble Truths came to the Buddha during a profound meditation under the famous Bodhi tree. When he first shared his insights with his 5 disciples, some of them couldn’t grasp what he was saying - they were trying to overcomplicate something that is really quite simple (not easy, but simple). I know I’m guilty of this myself, so I thought I’d share some of the more simplified insights I’ve found from these teachings that have already been really helpful and applicable to my daily life.
There is one teaching in particular that really stuck out to me and that is the second Noble Truth: “there is a cause/origin of suffering”. The Buddha states the cause/origin of all suffering is “grasping” (also sometimes called “attachment”). This could be grasping at a blissful moment that you don’t want to go away or grasping at the way you believe something should or shouldn’t be. As I’ve spent some time really thinking deeply about this, I started to recognize when these little moments of grasping occur throughout the day.
Most noticeably, I’ve witnessed this in the way I handle aversions. With the current state of the world, it can be challenging to not react and attach to feelings that we feel are justified. As I scroll through my phone, I’m bombarded by an endless array of negativity - war, famine, genocide, ecological disaster, late-stage capitalism…the list goes on.
As I swipe through these posts, a whole array of ‘aversions’ arise within my psyche: “it shouldn’t be like this!”, “their opinion is wrong!”. Essentially, “Why can’t people all think the same way I do? Then there wouldn’t be any problems like this”. I’m reminded that the very same people that are expressing these opinions are thinking the same exact thoughts. Hmm, hypocrite much?
I’ve found that the Buddha’s insight into this psychological back-and-forth is highly effective. He taught his followers that when an aversion arises within you, the task is not to try to “push the thought away” or even to question whether the aversion is justified or not. The only thing we have to do in oder to maintain our humanity in that moment is acknowledge the aversion. That’s it. By simply acknowledging, “ah, there is aversion” we are set free from getting caught in the tangled web of emotion - in how we “feel” about said aversion.
When we allow ourselves to sink into the feelings associated with the aversion, we allow our thought energy to move past the mental layer of our aura and into the emotional and physical layers. Typically, the emotions associated with an aversion are lower in vibration - like fear, anger, or even hatred. For example: “I don’t like that it has a horrible taste” or “I can’t believe he thinks that - he’s a terrible person!”
It’s not about whether the aversion is justified or morally “correct” - it’s about the energetic shift that happens as a result of us allowing that feeling to land in our body as an emotion. As these feelings land in our body, they become almost like a storehouse - hence, the phrase “pent up frustration”. Anger, frustration, and fear naturally activate our fight-or-flight response and we immediately put up our proverbial “shields” up and go into defensive mode, closing our hearts and minds.
This is what I mean by “maintaining our humanity”. It’s no coincidence that the Buddha received this insight underneath the Bodhi tree- an ancient fig tree. Think about how a tree has strong roots, and branches open wide to sky as if to say “I am ready to receive the sunlight”. When we are constantly in this defensive mode or avoiding situations or ideas due to our preferences/aversions, it is impossible for us to keep our hearts and minds open to the light.
An energetically open person has strong roots that are grounded in their own moral foundation. One could even say they are embodying this code of ethics through their daily words, actions, and thoughts. They don’t feel a need to defend their position, because it is built on a solid system of deep roots that cannot easily be turned over by a strong gust of wind. This comes from practice and (I would imagine) with age. Just like how the old oak tree has weathered many storms, we learn how to remain steadfast in our humanity until it is simply a state of being- something we don’t even need to “think” about.
With roots deep in your foundation, you can then respond to aversions with “ah, this is an aversion” and maybe even begin to recognize the mirror - the unconscious aspects of yourself - reflected back to you in that person. Here are a few questions I’ve been considering lately as a I ponder this insight:
What is it about that situation / person / idea that is triggering something within me?
Can I identify the part of myself that is triggered by this? What does that part look like, sound like, feel like? When did that part first form?
There is a quote by Nelson Mandela that highlights this beautifully:
“I knew as well as I knew anything that the oppressor must be liberated just as surely as the oppressed. A man who takes away another man’s freedom is a prisoner of hatred, he is locked behind the bars of prejudice and narrow-mindedness. I am not truly free if I am taking away someone else’s freedom, just as surely as I am not free when my freedom is taken from me. The oppressed and the oppressor alike are robbed of their humanity. When I walked out of prison, that was my mission, to liberate the oppressed and the oppressor both.”
In order to not attach to these aversions - the hatred, the judgement, the fear - we must first face and liberate the oppressor within ourselves. This simple practice of acknowledging when aversions rise and remaining curious and open about what they are teaching us is the foundation to cultivating true, unconditional compassion and love for ourselves and those around us. Nelson Mandela knew this well, and it is this profound insight that inspired him and the Buddha to lead some of the most powerful movements of peace and liberation this world has ever known.
